Damage Done

So I get on the scale this morning and I was very happy to see that I and steadily heading toward my weight loss goal. However, I am not getting there fast enough or not as fast as I would like. I know better not to rush weight loss and slow is the way to go. I just am very anxious to get back to feeling like my old self again. I have already lost like 40 pounds but I gained about 80.......enough said.

But there is something else on my mind. A few nights ago I over heard my neighbors fighting. Someone was getting accused of cheating and being told to sleep in the car. It got real nasty. Lots of yelling and screaming and door slamming. The entire time that I was listening all I could think to myself was how grateful I am to not have to have nights like that anymore. I began to feel sorry for their son (he plays with my son) having to listen to his parents argue like that. I remember arguing like that with my 5 year olds farther not even once stopping to consider what my boys might be thinking or going through. It seems to me that you can only see all the damage that a volatile relationship like that is doing once you are on the outside of it. I remember a few months after I left my volatile relationship my oldest son said to me "mom do you know what I just noticed....you don't cry anymore". It was only then that I realized what they must have went through. At that point I made a vow to never put my boys in a situation like that again.

Now the crazy thing about this night is that I fell asleep listening to my neighbors fight and then proceeded to dream that my ex had a new girlfriend and all I wanted to do was beat her up. Trust me when I say this, I am not a fighter! So I have no idea what that is about. I would love to hear your opinions.